What a journey this is. So thankful, sorry, that I have found ya’ll. However I really am having a dreadful time, accepting the crap my STBX is doing. I will write about our 1st Mediation and the next blog is “The Autopsy of a 17 year, 18 in 14 days Marriage + 4 years credit “being, living together as I raised his, mine and our 5 children”
My biggest stumbling block was (and at times, continues to be) anger. I could not get past the deliberate nature of what he had done. Holding me, telling me how much he loved me and would miss me while his bride’s ring sat in his car, ready to be placed on her finger within the week. The years of lies and manipulations that covered the hemorrhaging accounts. And, worst of all, he went on the attack with the divorce, blaming me for everything. How could I not be angry? Livid?
I spent much of the last two and half years wrestling with the “how.” How could he do this? How could he seek to destroy the one he claimed to love (and seemed to show love to up until the last text)? How could he kiss me, be intimate with me, knowing that he was orchestrating this symphony of destruction? …
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gratefulgill 